Seeing the Really Big Picture

I'm not really a big picture kind of gal. I tend to favor small pictures, and to be perfectly honest, I really prefer things in the form of a nice, neat list. Things that I can complete and then check-off that list.

Perfect example . . . G's school sent home a packing list for his trip this week. I immediately got down to business. I was crossing items off with a blue pen that we already had, marking items with a red pen that we needed to purchase, and highlighting items in yellow that were questionable additions to the packing kit. This is how I work best.

On Sunday after church, I did the final triple check that we had everything in the bag. I went through it with little G so that he would know where everything was and to ensure he understood how the labeled Ziploc bags for each day of the week would work. Once our job was complete, we zipped up his bag, and I looked at that list with immense satisfaction.

Little G left the room to go and play, and G looked at me and whispered, "Did you pack him any surprises?"

Ouch! I had been so caught up with my list that I didn't even think about putting in a few little extras for our sweet boy. This was not a proud moment.

Luckily, we were all on our way to the park so I was able to duck into a little store and pick up a few things to tuck into his very carefully packed bag.

It's these kinds of lessons that have finally caught on with me as today I experienced what I think will be a defining moment in my life.

Today has been an ordinary day, nothing different about it than our other days lately. We spent the morning at home, and then I gathered the boys at the table for lunch, as I do everyday. It was during this lunch that I had an epiphany.

As I sat watching the boys enjoy their meal, I realized that it is these seemingly unimportant moments that are actually the most important moments in their little lives. It is in these everyday moments that our precious children are being shaped and molded into who they are and what they will stand for and what they will hold dear. This realization has truly shaken me to my core.

I have just come to understand that these boys will learn respect and patience and kindness from watching me interact with others. They will learn how to handle frustration from watching how I handle myself when I am frustrated. They will learn how to care for others from seeing how I care for those around me. They will build their self-confidence and self-esteem by my acceptance and encouragement of their strengths and weaknesses. They will learn about unconditional love and unwavering trust and lifelong commitment from my relationship with their father, my husband.

Suffice it to say that I am feeling quite overwhelmed right now and sure wishing I could go back and un-say and un-do so many things!

What's even more overwhelming and just boggling my mind at the moment is the fact that these everyday lessons will not only affect my children, but will affect how my children will raise their children, and how their children will raise theirs, you get the idea.

I am thankful that this big picture was revealed to me today. And I'm even more thankful that I was not working on something from my to-do list at lunch so that I didn't miss it!